Here’s what I imagine a trailer for Illumination’s The Legend of Zelda: The Movie would look like…
Ext. Hyrule Field – Day
Adult Link gallops through Hyrule Field on Epona, cutting down hoards of Bokoblins who close in from both sides. In the distance, a Lynel holds a helpless Princess Zelda aloft. Survivor’s Eye of the Tiger plays in the background.
Zelda: [Britishly] Link! You know what to do!
Link flips from his horse and, in slow motion, fires an arrow from his bow, striking the Lynel in the head. He grabs Zelda’s hand mid-flip and rides into Hyrule Castle Town, where the delighted crowds chant his name.
Crowd: Link! Link! Link!
Close up on Link’s smiling face as he gradually closes his eyes. The music stops and his eyes open to…
Int. Link’s bedroom – Day
Navi: Link! Link! Hey!
Child Link sits up in bed and rubs his head. He grumbles and walks through to the kitchen where his uncle and apprentice, Groose, are hard at work at a grindstone. Super snappy delivery here, quick cuts.
Groose: Well if it isn’t the fairy boy! Hey Link, still dreaming about your famous girlfriend?
Groose and Uncle laugh. Link opens a bottle of Lon Lon Milk and takes a big gulp.
Uncle: Let me guess, Navi didn’t wake you up again, huh? Well, come over here and help us with this mould.
Link begrudgingly walks over to the pair and helps lift a huge stone slab.
Link: [Clearing his throat] You know, Uncle, I was thinking. I don’t know that I want to make swords my whole life, I want to be a knight and become a great hero, just like the legends.
Uncle: [Scoffs] You? A legend?
Groose: The Legend of Link!
He laughs so heavily that he falls backwards off his stool.
Link: Hmm…
A ‘Holding Our for a Hero’ instrumental cover gradually fades up…
Black screen. Hylian text appears out of the darkness, spinning to read: “This Summer” as the music gets louder.
Int. Cave – Night
An old man rummages through a chest as Link moves eagerly behind him to see what he’s looking for.
Old Man: You shouldn’t head out all lonesome like — here, have this.
Link raises an eyebrow. The old man swings around, revealing a small sword.
Link: Ehh, do you not have something a little more flashy?
Old Man: First time meeting a mysterious old man in a cave, huh?
Link: [Shrugs]
Black screen. More text spins around to reveal “The legend”. Bonnie Tyler continues.
Ext. Gerudo Desert – Day
Link and Zelda stand back to back, surrounded by Gibdos.
Zelda: And you said that you wanted to take the scenic route.
Link: Well, excuse me, Princess!
Link rolls his eyes and dashes at an oncoming enemy, slashing it five times before turning around, out of breath. He sees Zelda swiftly dispatch a hoard with golden beams of light that fire from her hands.
Zelda clears the rest of the enemies and brushes the sand from her dress.
Link: And when were you going to tell me that you could do that?
Zelda: It never came up. You’re really not much of a conversationalist, you know.
Black screen. Text fades in saying “Begins…”
Sizzle reel cuts between Link in various Hylian locations — Zora’s Domain, Kakariko Village, sailing on the Great Sea. One shot shows a Korok popping up, Link screams and bats it out of the air.
Ext. Goron City – Day
Link and Zelda walk along a busy, sandy street. Various Gorons call out to each other as they walk past.
Goron #1: You rock, Goro!
Goron #2: No, you rock, Goro!
Link: Excuse me, we’re looking fo—
Goron #3: You rock the most of all, Goro!
Link: Sorry, can we jus—
Goron #1: Man, how are you Goros so rockin’?
Goron #4: Did I hear that somebody rocks?
Link stomps his feet and shouts loudly.
Link: Can we just please agree that everyone rocks?!
A small Goron rolls up to Link, clears his throat.
Small Goron: [Jarringly deep voice] Not cool, man. Not cool.
Ext. Hyrule Field – Night
Link and Zelda watch the Blood Moon appear in the sky.
Zelda: The Blood Moon Rises once again. Please be careful, Link.
Link: Why does it always have to be a “Blood Moon”? Whatever happened to the “Milkshake Moon” or the “Moon that doesn’t try to kill us all”?
Zelda: Keep up the fighting talk, Hero of Hyrule…
Black screen. Golden text spins around to reveal “The Legend of Zelda: The Movie”. ‘I Need a Hero’ reaches its seventh climax and suddenly stops.
Int. Hyrule Castle – Night
Ganondorf sits on a throne, looking at Link who stands before him with the Master Sword in hand.
Ganondorf: I am Ganondorf, king of the Gerudo. You will not stand in my way.
Link laughs.
Link: Ganondorf? What, kind of a name is that? Did your parents want to name you after a cough syrup?
The Moblin guards surrounding the pair glance at each other nervously as Link laughs for several more seconds. Ganondorf rolls his eyes in exasperation. A beat. Ganondorf lunges at Link, who braces for an attack.
Black screen. The words “Coming Soon” appear as a solo piano slowly plays the first three notes of ‘Zelda’s Lullaby’.
Here’s what I imagine a trailer for Illumination’s The Legend of Zelda: The Movie would look like…
Ext. Hyrule Field – Day
Adult Link gallops through Hyrule Field on Epona, cutting down hoards of Bokoblins who close in from both sides. In the distance, a Lynel holds a helpless Princess Zelda aloft. Survivor’s Eye of the Tiger plays in the background.
Zelda: [Britishly] Link! You know what to do!
Link flips from his horse and, in slow motion, fires an arrow from his bow, striking the Lynel in the head. He grabs Zelda’s hand mid-flip and rides into Hyrule Castle Town, where the delighted crowds chant his name.
Crowd: Link! Link! Link!
Close up on Link’s smiling face as he gradually closes his eyes. The music stops and his eyes open to…
Int. Link’s bedroom – Day
Navi: Link! Link! Hey!
Child Link sits up in bed and rubs his head. He grumbles and walks through to the kitchen where his uncle and apprentice, Groose, are hard at work at a grindstone. Super snappy delivery here, quick cuts.
Groose: Well if it isn’t the fairy boy! Hey Link, still dreaming about your famous girlfriend?
Groose and Uncle laugh. Link opens a bottle of Lon Lon Milk and takes a big gulp.
Uncle: Let me guess, Navi didn’t wake you up again, huh? Well, come over here and help us with this mould.
Link begrudgingly walks over to the pair and helps lift a huge stone slab.
Link: [Clearing his throat] You know, Uncle, I was thinking. I don’t know that I want to make swords my whole life, I want to be a knight and become a great hero, just like the legends.
Uncle: [Scoffs] You? A legend?
Groose: The Legend of Link!
He laughs so heavily that he falls backwards off his stool.
Link: Hmm…
A ‘Holding Our for a Hero’ instrumental cover gradually fades up…
Black screen. Hylian text appears out of the darkness, spinning to read: “This Summer” as the music gets louder.
Int. Cave – Night
An old man rummages through a chest as Link moves eagerly behind him to see what he’s looking for.
Old Man: You shouldn’t head out all lonesome like — here, have this.
Link raises an eyebrow. The old man swings around, revealing a small sword.
Link: Ehh, do you not have something a little more flashy?
Old Man: First time meeting a mysterious old man in a cave, huh?
Link: [Shrugs]
Black screen. More text spins around to reveal “The legend”. Bonnie Tyler continues.
Ext. Gerudo Desert – Day
Link and Zelda stand back to back, surrounded by Gibdos.
Zelda: And you said that you wanted to take the scenic route.
Link: Well, excuse me, Princess!
Link rolls his eyes and dashes at an oncoming enemy, slashing it five times before turning around, out of breath. He sees Zelda swiftly dispatch a hoard with golden beams of light that fire from her hands.
Zelda clears the rest of the enemies and brushes the sand from her dress.
Link: And when were you going to tell me that you could do that?
Zelda: It never came up. You’re really not much of a conversationalist, you know.
Black screen. Text fades in saying “Begins…”
Sizzle reel cuts between Link in various Hylian locations — Zora’s Domain, Kakariko Village, sailing on the Great Sea. One shot shows a Korok popping up, Link screams and bats it out of the air.
Ext. Goron City – Day
Link and Zelda walk along a busy, sandy street. Various Gorons call out to each other as they walk past.
Goron #1: You rock, Goro!
Goron #2: No, you rock, Goro!
Link: Excuse me, we’re looking fo—
Goron #3: You rock the most of all, Goro!
Link: Sorry, can we jus—
Goron #1: Man, how are you Goros so rockin’?
Goron #4: Did I hear that somebody rocks?
Link stomps his feet and shouts loudly.
Link: Can we just please agree that everyone rocks?!
A small Goron rolls up to Link, clears his throat.
Small Goron: [Jarringly deep voice] Not cool, man. Not cool.
Ext. Hyrule Field – Night
Link and Zelda watch the Blood Moon appear in the sky.
Zelda: The Blood Moon Rises once again. Please be careful, Link.
Link: Why does it always have to be a “Blood Moon”? Whatever happened to the “Milkshake Moon” or the “Moon that doesn’t try to kill us all”?
Zelda: Keep up the fighting talk, Hero of Hyrule…
Black screen. Golden text spins around to reveal “The Legend of Zelda: The Movie”. ‘I Need a Hero’ reaches its seventh climax and suddenly stops.
Int. Hyrule Castle – Night
Ganondorf sits on a throne, looking at Link who stands before him with the Master Sword in hand.
Ganondorf: I am Ganondorf, king of the Gerudo. You will not stand in my way.
Link laughs.
Link: Ganondorf? What, kind of a name is that? Did your parents want to name you after a cough syrup?
The Moblin guards surrounding the pair glance at each other nervously as Link laughs for several more seconds. Ganondorf rolls his eyes in exasperation. A beat. Ganondorf lunges at Link, who braces for an attack.
Black screen. The words “Coming Soon” appear as a solo piano slowly plays the first three notes of ‘Zelda’s Lullaby’.
